17 Signs You're Obsessed with Plants | Mulhall's
March 9 // Happenings

17 Signs You’re Obsessed with Plants

We know some of you can relate. There’s that moment you get your very first houseplant – and then you get another. And somehow, before you know it, you’re living in a houseplant jungle with a whole new perspective on life – one that’s decidedly more plant-centered than before. So, how can you tell when you’ve crossed the line to become one of us – the plant-obsessed? Consider a few of these signs to watch for – do any of these apply to you?

  1. You’re always fighting the urge to step in and save the sad and mistreated plants of the world – from your neighbor’s kitchen, the hair salon, the coffee shop – anywhere at all.
  2. You’ve audibly mumbled to a total stranger, “That fishtail palm isn’t gonna make it there – not enough light.”
  3. You spent your entire vacation texting your friends selfies of you with all of your incredible new plant finds.
  4. Nobody goes to the zoo with you anymore because you’ll inevitably get left behind in the jungle – staring at the building-sized fiddle leaf figs and studying the aerial roots on all the monsteras.
  5. You keep getting rid of furniture to make more space for your cacti – like our own tropical buyer Jasmine Osten.
  6. You’re “not a cat person” because you once saw a kitten chewing all the babies off a spider plant.
  7. People have walked out of the room to avoid listening to you point out all the houseplants living on your favorite tv shows. In fact, you can’t watch The Office without feeling sorry for that dracaena who looks about as thrilled to be there as Pam.
  8. But, you’re proud to claim that you are in fact one of the original followers of the Instagram account @plants_in_seinfeld.
  9. You came home from a trip to Arizona to realize that ninety percent of your photos are of cacti – just the cacti. (Or you just plan all your trips based on where you’ll find the best cacti – like our friends, Rita Auer and Mike Crump.)
  10. You’ve been known to turn down social invitations because…you have to water your plants.
  11. You’re currently losing sleep at night – worrying whether your maidenhair fern is getting enough humidity.
  12. When visiting botanical gardens, you find yourself saying things like, “Would you look at that Phoenix roebellini! It must be so happy!”
  13. You and your roommate had a falling out after a snarky comment about the largish number of plants gathering by your window sill.
  14. Your family members all turn to you for help when their plants are dying.
  15. You rejected the first seven homes you looked at because “the windows were too small for a bird of paradise.”
  16. You spend your evenings scouring eBay for vintage botanical garden paraphernalia.
  17. You own more than 40 houseplants, and you’re still looking for more.

If you can relate to any of these, congratulations – you’re officially one of us! It’s ok – we understand. And we’ll talk plants with you anytime you want.